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By Dan Blankowski

My “Dano’s Monday Funnies” weekly DJ newsletter has it roots in the ’80s when I had a comedy radio show in Pittsburgh on Saturday morning.


30 years of radio sharpened my wit, and in September of 2018 I started sending jokes and funny stuff to my friends.

dj newsletter

I found it a surprisingly effective way of generating leads. I began asking clients after every gig if it’d be OK to add them to my list. I got a 99% thumbs-up.


I began sending it through MailChimp so I can track open rates and to date I’ve booked DOZENS of events that started with a “Reply” to the Funnies newsletter with something like, “Hey Dan, are you available on …?”

I wasn’t expecting that result, because I have zero promotion of my company in the newsletter. It costs me $10/week for MailChimp and about two hours of my time, and it’s generated $20,000+ in revenue so far.

dj newsletter dan

I also post a link to subscribe in social media, and I’m up to about 700 recipients. I’ve had a total of 14 unsubscribes — usually from humorless turds!

This is a great way to stay top-of-mind for clients and friends without looking like I’m “selling” anything. It’s a “soft touch” as opposed to the “hard touch” of a company newsletter that most people ignore.

This is a great way to stay top-of-mind for clients and friends without looking like I’m “selling” anything.

I will do contests within the Funnies — such as the Disco Ball giveaway I did a few months ago to everybody who writes a review online. I gave people one entry for every online review they left for me (Google, Yelp and Facebook) and had a random drawing in January for a 20-inch Disco Ball.

This is content people want to read. How do I know? I usually get 38-42% open rates on Mondays, and another 14-15% on the re-send to non-openers on Thursday – they’re sent at 4:15 am. (Frankly, I’m disappointed that it’s not 100%).

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People ask me where I get the material. I have a LOT of joke books, there are endless humor web sites (even Readers Digest is a great source), and I have dozens of friends and clients sending me material on a regular basis. I try to include humor you don’t see all over Facebook and Reddit.

My DJ newsletter usually get 42% open rates on Mondays, and another 15% on the re-send to non-openers on Thursday.

I’ve always called it “Marketing that doesn’t look like marketing” and it’s all about being unique — I must stand out from the other 175,454 DJs in this market!

What are the most popular jokes? Without a doubt — the “Dad Jokes.”

dj newsletter

Anything with a bad pun is also popular (including cartoons and memes).

Dan’s favorite funnies in his DJ newsletter 

1. “The word ‘Diputseromneve’ may look ridiculous, but backwards it’s even more stupid.”

2. A man hasn’t been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup.

Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results. “I’m afraid I have some very bad news,” the doctor says. “You’re dying, and you don’t have much time left.”

“Oh, that’s terrible!” says the man. “How long have I got?” “Ten,” the doctor says sadly.

Ten?” the man asks. “Ten what? … Months? … Weeks? … What?!”

“Nine…”

3. MEANWHILE IN THE THEATER:
A man was sprawled across three seats in the movie theater, groaning loudly.

Other customers started complaining, and an usher came down to see what was going on.

“What are you doing, sir? What’s going on here? You’ve gotta get out of here – your’re bothering the other customers,” said the usher.

But the man on the seats started groaning louder and wouldn’t move, so the usher came back with the theater manager.

The manager said, “Look, sir … you can’t stay here – I’m gonna call the police if you don’t get out.”

The moans and cries got louder, and the manager was losing his patience.

“The usher is calling the police … where the hell did you come from anyway?”

The man looking up at the manager hovering over him, and pointed up.

“The balcony.”

4. My favorites:

Q – What says “Eoo?”
A – A cow with no lips.

Q – How did the blonde fisherman die?
A – He was run over by the Zamboni.

Q – What do you make with epileptic lettuce?
A – A seizure salad.

Q – What’s green & brown … has six legs, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree onto you?
A – A pool table

Q – What’s blue and not very heavy?
A – Light blue.

See why I have so much fun creating this? I find myself laughing hysterically at my desk even when nobody else is in the house!

Dan Blankowski is the owner of DJ Dano Atlanta Entertainment in Marietta, Georgia. He wrote about creating lasting memories for wedding couples in his last article for DJ Times. 

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